National Gallery, Trafalgar Square

Cosmo had been nagging me for weeks to take him to see the two Rembrandt self-portraits in The National Gallery in an effort to determine once and for all whether the illusion of depth really is owed to the painter's reputed binocular vision or whether it's just nonsense. (He determined it was all just nonsense...)

All London museums offer a great day out for incompetent mothers, but the National Gallery is particularly good. There's tons of space and a sparsity of doors so it's easy for even the most incompetent buggy-driver to get around. Even better, if you're baby's in a sling, you might find them transfixed by all the paintings. I didn't think Cosmo would take any notice, but he seemed to really enjoy staring at the faces...

The National Gallery welcomes breastfeeding anywhere and everywhere, so feel free to sit down in front of a Picasso. However, if you don't want to add to the bare breasts already on display, there's a nursing room with change facilities on the first floor of the Sainsbury Wing. It's quite well hidden so ask security if you can't find it.